Whatever.

It's been a SUPER long time since I posted anything. I apologize. But my sleeping patterns have been so jacked up, I never really feel like doing much of anything. I've been feeling sick as well. But it wasn't because of stress or anything like that, thankfully. However, now it is. James got his financial aid check FINALLY in the mail yesterday. Since we currently don't have a bank account because that scam some guy pulled on us, he went to Integra Bank thinking he could open up a new one since I paid the bank all the money they were asking for and since the man who was "helping" me said that if I paid it the fraud would be off of our credit. Apparently not. James couldn't open an account because it's still on our credit. And I don't have the number for the "helpful" man. I'm hoping my mom still has it.

Now that I've been put through a horrible scam process, I don't really trust anyone. So I'm freaking out that somehow this guy calling saying he was with US Bank was a scam too and I lost $1400. And if that's the case, I'd still owe US Bank. I'm really really freaking out. But I'm going to my mom's today so hopefully we can get this straighten out.

It's funny because I think back to a few years ago when I was super depressed...I wish for that time back...because the amount of hardship and pain dealing with all of this. I feel like a complete failure. And I don't have a job and I'm not in school anymore. I'm pretty much right. But...I know that I had to move out and if I moved out, I couldn't work at Target or go to NKU... I'm letting people get to me though. Like my father. I asked him for some money so I couldn't maybe get some dinner since we're living with James' mom and she's on food stamps and a set income...and there's not really much food in the house. Of course he said no. "You quit your job and you're not in school. I'm not giving you any money. You should just move back home."

I keep making plans trying to make something out of my life...but things keep stopping me. I'm going to give up soon because I see no point in trying any longer.